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Writer's pictureSandra Chaloux

11 Ways We Give Our Power Away



"The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any."– Alice Walker

I love listening to the wisdom and higher perspective from the Spirit realm. The following ideas about how we give our power away came from Archangel Raphael channeled by Kelly Kolodney. Archangel Raphael is the Archangel of Healing and can be felt or experienced as either a feminine or masculine presence. Kelly Kolodney brings through Archangel Raphael as a feminine presence which really resonates with me. You can check out Kelly channeling Archangel Raphael on her YouTube channel here.


Anyway, I want to share this article because it really helped me to understand where I was leaking energy or giving power away without really realizing it. If you tend to be a people pleaser or are an empath, this will be helpful for you as well. I have realized that my personal power is my life force energy and I need to learn to manage it wisely if I want to continue to grow and expand.


True Power is grounded in spiritual awareness. It has to do with trusting your inner wisdom, standing your ground, and speaking your truth. We must use our power with Love and choose words that do not wound others. Unfortunately, we see so many examples of abuse of power. So, we want to make sure we don't impose our power on to others and on the other hand we don’t want to give our power away to others or let other people control us or abuse us. The ideal scenario is we learn to exercise our own power and allow and respect other people to do the same and we act for the highest good of all.


11 Ways We Give Our Power Away

◦ Comparing ourself to others

◦ Feeling unworthy

◦ Feeling unimportant

◦ Putting another first (their agenda), sometimes not even recognizing it. What someone else wants comes before your own.

◦ Allowing another to dismiss your presence. When you are with someone talking to them and they are distracted and scrolling on their phone. They are not honoring who you are. They are not present with you.

◦ When you become hostage to someone else’s agenda. For example, you make plans with someone at a certain time -you show up and someone isn’t dressed yet, now you are waiting and the agreed upon plans are diverted.

◦ When someone has a pattern of being late or cancelling at the last minute and you continue to be in a relationship with them.

◦ When you are in a power struggle with someone-they are someone taking a little piece of your power.

◦ When you need something from someone -Say they are in a different status than you are, you take something from them. There is a string attached to them. They feel they can dictate to you.

◦ You do something to meet the expectation of another out of obligation.

◦ When you lie about what you have accomplished, who you are, and when you are out of your integrity in some way.


How do you know you are standing in your power?

Standing in Your Power - When you Embrace who you are without apology. Accept it. Love it. Share it without it needing to be something other than it is, without feeling shame.


You are in your power when you are grounded, in alignment, authentic, speaking your truth, and giving when you have the energy to do so and from a good feeling of being of service.


How do you know when you aren’t standing in your power?

When you do something to please another or you do something detrimental to yourself (give when you are depleted), indulge in things that are not for your well-being, when you are deflecting, or defending your behavior, when you are unwilling to look at what is triggering you and is coming up to be healed. Also being in debt is not being in your power.


How do you know when you are giving from compassion versus giving your power away?

When you feel resentment or agitated when giving to another, you are giving your power away. When a behavior is forced to be perceived as compassion, you are not in alignment and it turns into anger and rage and resentment. It is not true compassion if it is not normally rising from within the heart. The other person may not need compassion from you at that moment. They might need you to speak your truth. This is where discernment comes to play. How often does the pattern return?


You cannot rescue anyone. In wanting to, you interfere with their soul lesson. Pity doesn’t help anyone. We are all whole and complete in our True state despite what is being presented in any given moment. You can hold compassion and space for them but they have to temporarily sit in their pain/experience -that is required for their own inner resources, strength, awakening and growth to emerge.


Anyway, self-awareness is the first step toward self-mastery and spiritual growth. Here is to all of us becoming more empowered conscious creators of the New Age. Finally, a few affirmation statements to help you reprogram your mind to stand in your power.


Affirmations: I AM energized by the power of Universal Love. I AM now accessing my personal power, and taking control of my emotions. I AM the master of my desires. I set clearly-defined boundaries.


#Self-Awareness



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