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Shifting the Program Around Grief and Death


Shifting the Program Around Grief and Death


A friend of mine from childhood passed away this week. I shed a few tears as I thought about the rough 15 years he had prior. Kidney failure, dialysis, kidney transplant, anti-rejection drugs that resulted first in brain cancer, then colon cancer, complications during surgery, heart stopped temporarily, kidney failed, back on dialysis in the hospital, adenocarcinoma, cancer in liver and spine. He chose to stop medical treatment and passed away a day later. This friend lost his oldest brother to Leukemia in December and is survived by his 93-year-old mother and a brother.


Even though I wasn’t in the hospital during his final weeks, I was feeling drained energetically, was physically exhausted during the day (as I got the updates on him) especially the 2 days before he passed, and couldn’t sleep at night.


Then I had a conversation with Abraham yesterday through Benny Ferguson who changed everything for me and I want to share it. (Abraham is a collective of non-physical beings here to support humanity to raise our consciousness and to help us manifest the life of our dreams).


Abraham told me that my experience of the loss of my friend and how the feeling was manifesting within me (deep sadness and grief) is a program. They said that I/we have been programmed to feel this way about death. They pointed out that there are traditions on our planet who feel and experience the opposite when a father or mother transitions – that there is excitement and celebration and honoring. This kind of snapped me out of my grief, because I have for some time believed that we come to school room earth for various experiences and soul lessons. When we are done, we transition and our soul graduates. We become whole and return to Source. Why wouldn’t we celebrate the transition as joyous? Even though I believed this, I realized that I was feeling sad because I was focusing more on the details of the suffering and pain that he and his family were experiencing. Abraham pointed out to me that our culture has programmed us to focus on the pain and suffering especially around death.


This lowers our vibration and zaps us of our life force energy. But we always have a choice where we focus our thoughts. Then I started to focus on the fond and funny memories I had of my friend in happier times and felt grateful to have had those and to have known him. My energy bounced back almost immediately.


Abraham recommended to focus on getting back and staying in a high vibration and going from there. They said it doesn’t mean that you tell someone how they feel is wrong but to realize nothing requires you to go into a low vibration. They said even in death, you are guarding your vibration. The doors of understanding, perception and interpretation open up to you as a result of expressing higher vibration consistently. Your awareness expands alittle more as you raise your vibration. They said it is all a matter of vibration. Abraham said that we are capable of attaining their level of understanding as we walk in our physical body -it is a matter of frequency and tone.


Our feelings and emotions are our guidance system for determining where we are vibrating.


Low vibration thoughts/feelings – frustration, anger, hate, pain, suffering, sadness, conflict.

High vibration thoughts/feelings – love, joy, excitement, exhilaration, radiance, beauty, vibrance.


We always have a choice in every moment where we focus our thoughts and our thoughts will inform the feelings and emotions we experience and what we call to us in our physical experience.


What is really fun and enlightening about working with Abraham is that they have helped me to understand the subconscious beliefs I have had that were causing the resistance in me that was preventing me from becoming the highest and best version of myself. The tricky part with inner work is that you can’t swap out a faulty belief until you become aware that you have it. This is where a trusted friend, spiritual guide, or professional can come in. They can help you see what you cannot or have not been able to recognize yourself.


When I find myself in a low vibration feeling now, I try to determine what is the untrue thought or belief that is causing that feeling, and create declarations or affirmations of who I really am and what I really want or believe in the present moment (I AM declarations). I feel into the new ideas and overtime the new ideas become more true than the faulty old ideas.


Final thought -Boy, have we picked up and adopted a bunch of faulty ideas along our physical trail. The good news is once we become aware of them, we can rewrite the program and the script about ourselves and our lives.


Now that I have introduced this idea to you, do you notice yourself focusing on pain and suffering in your experiences or in others? This is the first step in transforming it.

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